You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Can Purell be used as lube?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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