Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
