And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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