do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
