ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Apparently you make a good broom.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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