Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
