Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
