I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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