Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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