as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
