we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
