Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
