...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
