I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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