Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
