She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
