Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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