She's JV to your varsity
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
