i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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