addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Panties = found
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
