yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
i now understand why vodka
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
