just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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