Your face is a jimmy john
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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