I just pynch a tree in the face
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
