My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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