I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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