Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Randomize
