WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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