YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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