You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I licked your asshole in confidence.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
