i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I could make wine with my vomit
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
