I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
