i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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