His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
