Sry I called you an 8
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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