We won't sleep together?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Who died my cat blue again?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
