I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Randomize
