I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I would ride that face into the sunset
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize