Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
