This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
