So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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