Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
