New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I looked at my own cervix.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize