Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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