We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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