Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
