Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
