South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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