Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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