yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
